Ever sit around and wonder what ultra-successful people know that others don’t? Me too!
So here are 3 of the top mindsets that are worth their weight in gold.
#1 Gratitude breeds happiness. Expectation breeds misery.
Picture it – you start making more money, your personal life is the best it has ever been… you’re on a roll like never before and can’t seem to lose.
Then one day it gets even better. You stop at the store and not only are you given a free scratch off, but you scratch it off to reveal you’ve won a million dollars!
But on your way out of the store, someone bumps into you and by the time you get to your car, you notice the ticket is gone.
How would you feel in that situation? I’d be pissed! I wouldn’t stop thinking about it, and would lose sleep over it. Wondering… what happened? How? Who’s responsible? Is there a chance I can recover the ticket?
Now, here’s the interesting part. Imagine that everything was the same except you had stopped at a different store that day and didn’t get the winning scratch off in the first place.
The circumstances of your life would be exactly the same before and after you went to the store. Your job, your relationships, everything is still going better than ever. But in one scenario you’re miserable (because of the lost ticket) and in the other you’re still on cloud nine (because you didn’t have it to lose in the first place).
The point here is that happiness is largely in our minds. Regardless of circumstance, our mind still has incredible influence over how happy we are within that circumstance. And often we don’t feel happy about what we do have because we’re miserable about what we don’t have… or past failures… or what might have been.
Life is funny like that… and gratitude can be tough. For instance – how can you possibly be grateful when your neighbor falls ass backwards in to money while you bust your ass?
It’s not easy, but realizing that happiness lies within us if we focus on what we can control – as opposed to what we don’t have – is a big step toward achieving the happiness and contentment we all crave.
And it’s not all just mental trickery and mumbo jumbo. Once you’re able to let go, be grateful, and focus on what you can control, it’s not just your mental state that improves… the reality of your circumstances will improve right along with it.
Which brings us to the next one…
#2 You’re in control
Excuses are easy. And between you and me, sometimes they’re even valid (though perhaps not as often as we’d like to think).
But never have they helped move someone toward success. Let that sink in… as valid as your excuse may be, it can’t possibly help you succeed. Therefore, whether or not there’s a valid excuse for something is completely… totally… utterly… IRRELEVANT. Taking responsibility is one of the most important foundations of success.
Since excuses aren’t helpful, we must train ourselves to focus only on what we can control.
Life is not always fair. In the game of life, it’s all about how you react, and getting results despite circumstance is part of it. It may be entirely possible that your situation is harder than most. And I empathize, I really do. But all that means is to succeed you have to play on level 10 whereas everyone else gets to play on level 5.
Work with the cards you’re dealt, take the challenge, and if you’re still able to get results… you’ll be even stronger than the person who has it a little easier.
Great entrepreneurs and financially successful individuals in general nearly always have an internal locus of control. All that means is that the person believes that he or she can (to a great extent) control outcomes. A person with an external locus of control believes that they are where they are because (to a great extent) it happened to him or her (i.e. fate or luck).
Taking responsibility for everything in your life isn’t just about being the upstanding thing to do or because you should beat up on yourself. It’s simply because it’s in your own best interest.
Those who take responsibility tend to make things happen because of it. Remember, you may not always be able to control your circumstance, but you ALWAYS have complete and total control over your reaction to a situation.
If you always have the right reaction, your life will be richer than you can imagine both in terms of fulfillment and money in the bank. And while nobody can react perfectly all the time, realizing that you’re in control is an absolute necessity to getting it right more often than not.
Once you’re in control, you need to make sure you’re always expanding. To do that, you’ll have to play outside of your comfort zone.
Which brings us to…
#3 Fear is fuel
Ever had to do something that makes you nervous or afraid?
For a lot of people, public speaking is terrifying.
Your heart pounds, your voice shakes… and you just want to run and hide.
But guess what? EVERYONE experiences fear. Your reaction to it is what counts.
Just ask The Boss…
“Right before I go onstage my heart beats a little faster, my hands sweat a little, my legs go numb as if I’m getting pins and needles, and then I get a tight feeling in the pit of my stomach that starts to spin around and around. When I get all those feelings I know I’m excited, pumped up, and ready to go onstage.” – Bruce Springsteen
Think of it this way…
When you get nervous, what are the symptoms? Your heart races, your palms get sweaty, and you focus on what’s about to happen.
Ever get really excited? What are the symptoms? Your heart races, your palms get sweaty, and you focus on what’s about to happen.
Our natural reaction to the feelings of nervousness are to try to suppress them and get rid of them. Don’t!
Instead, when you start to get nervous, just say to yourself… “Wow, this is exciting!”.
And it’s not a lie… things that cause us to feel nervous generally ARE exciting. The only difference between elite performers like athletes or professional speakers is that they have learned to interpret the symptoms as excitement rather than fear and anxiety.
So, remember, the next time you feel really nervous about something just say to yourself… “Wow, this is exciting!”, and tackle it as an athlete would during a big game.
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Keep in mind that if you ever find yourself saying “I already know this”, instead ask “What can I learn from this?” and make sure you’re actually applying it in your daily life.
By adopting the right mindsets, you build the foundation for a better life.
Until next time… Do. Learn. Repeat.